DISSECTING THE CHICKEN JOKE (for two)
Two Characters 1 and 2
A play in one act - by Thom Goddard
Click here for the performance by Sandeep John and I shot during the Corona Lockdown: https://youtu.be/Iamk4QdBozA
Click here for the performance by Sandeep John and I shot during the Corona Lockdown: https://youtu.be/Iamk4QdBozA
1. I’ve got a joke for you.
2. Oh yeah?
1. Why did the chicken cross the road?
2. Do you mean “For what purpose” did the chicken cross the road?
1. Yes.
2. Oh ok.
1. So “For what purpose" did the chicken cross the road?
2. Are we talking about one of us who’s afraid of a bully or an actual chicken?
1. An actual bird brain.
2. So you.
1. Ha ha. Funny, No, a feathered, two-legged, egg-creating, winged creature.
2. Oh, a gallus gallus domesticus
1. A what?
2. The scientific name for chicken.
1. Oh... then yes. A gally... gally... domesticy-thingy.
2. Gallus Gallus Domesticus.
1. Gallus Gallus Domesticus.
2. Perfect.
1. Ok then.
2. What?
1. So... “For what purpose” did the “Gallus Gallus Domesticus” cross the road?
2. Oh right. In what sense “cross”?
1. Eh?
2. Well did they upset it, step on its toe or steal some money?
1. What are you talking about?
2. In what way did they make the road cross?
1. No, no, no. Went across. From one side to the other.
2. Oh... Peregrinate.
1. What?
2. Decussate.
1. Are you speaking English?
2. Yes, of course. How about “Traverse”
1. Yes, that’s it. “Traverse from one side to the other”
2. Ah, now I get it.
1. So?
2. So?
1. Don’t make me say it again.
2. Oh... “For what purpose” did the “Gallus Gallus Domesticus” “Traverse” the road?
1. Yes. That’s it!
2. Ah... but.
1. No “buts”.
2. What do you mean “road”?
1. Everyone knows roads. The things people drive on. With cars. Or lorries. Or buses. Or... wait, you’ve got me doing it now.
2. Doing “it” what?
1. It doesn’t matter. Back to “Road”. What don’t you understand about “Road”?
2. Well, I can assume you mean asphalt highway.
1. Yes...
2. But...
1. I said no “buts”
2. What if its aspirational. Like dreams or desires?
1. I don’t know what you’re talking about.
2. You know. “The road to El Dorado”.
1. Where?
2. El Dorado. The city of gold.
1. Oh. But what’s that got to do with...
2. There is no actual city. “The Road to El Dorado” is a metaphor for our path through life to achieve enlightenment.
1. Ok. In fact, I can’t say anything because I don’t even know where we are.
2. The road. An asphalt highway or a higher extension...
1. Don’t finish that sentence! An asphalt highway.
2. Thank you for clearing that up.
1. No problem. So?
2. So... what?
1. So... “For what purpose” did the “Gallus Gallus Domesticus” “Traverse” the “Asphalt Highway”?
2. Hmmm... I do not know.
1. To get to the other side!!!
2. The other side?
1. Yes!
2. The ethereal plain or the juxtapose of where they set forth?
1. What? Oh... what now?
2. Well, are they looking to move on to a life beyond our mortal existence?
1. WHAT?
2. Are they looking to end their life? Die. And then move on to the ethereal plain. Or Heaven. You know get to “The Other Side”.
1. Erm... I don’t know.
2. Or the exact opposite of where their journey began from one edge of the asphalt highway to the other edge?
1. Erm... I think the second one. But now I don’t know.
2. Well, I think you should find out before you starting asking me questions.
1. I wasn’t asking you a question! Look it’s a classic joke - “Why did the chicken cross the road?”
2. You mean: For what purpose did the Gallus Gallus Domesticus traverse the asphalt highway?
1. Exactly!
2. Why?
1. “To get to the other side!”
2. You mean: To reach the etherial plain.
1. No.
2. Or: To reach the juxtapose position from which they began.
1. NO! NO! NO!
2. Well... if you’re going to tell a joke at least tell it properly.
2. Oh yeah?
1. Why did the chicken cross the road?
2. Do you mean “For what purpose” did the chicken cross the road?
1. Yes.
2. Oh ok.
1. So “For what purpose" did the chicken cross the road?
2. Are we talking about one of us who’s afraid of a bully or an actual chicken?
1. An actual bird brain.
2. So you.
1. Ha ha. Funny, No, a feathered, two-legged, egg-creating, winged creature.
2. Oh, a gallus gallus domesticus
1. A what?
2. The scientific name for chicken.
1. Oh... then yes. A gally... gally... domesticy-thingy.
2. Gallus Gallus Domesticus.
1. Gallus Gallus Domesticus.
2. Perfect.
1. Ok then.
2. What?
1. So... “For what purpose” did the “Gallus Gallus Domesticus” cross the road?
2. Oh right. In what sense “cross”?
1. Eh?
2. Well did they upset it, step on its toe or steal some money?
1. What are you talking about?
2. In what way did they make the road cross?
1. No, no, no. Went across. From one side to the other.
2. Oh... Peregrinate.
1. What?
2. Decussate.
1. Are you speaking English?
2. Yes, of course. How about “Traverse”
1. Yes, that’s it. “Traverse from one side to the other”
2. Ah, now I get it.
1. So?
2. So?
1. Don’t make me say it again.
2. Oh... “For what purpose” did the “Gallus Gallus Domesticus” “Traverse” the road?
1. Yes. That’s it!
2. Ah... but.
1. No “buts”.
2. What do you mean “road”?
1. Everyone knows roads. The things people drive on. With cars. Or lorries. Or buses. Or... wait, you’ve got me doing it now.
2. Doing “it” what?
1. It doesn’t matter. Back to “Road”. What don’t you understand about “Road”?
2. Well, I can assume you mean asphalt highway.
1. Yes...
2. But...
1. I said no “buts”
2. What if its aspirational. Like dreams or desires?
1. I don’t know what you’re talking about.
2. You know. “The road to El Dorado”.
1. Where?
2. El Dorado. The city of gold.
1. Oh. But what’s that got to do with...
2. There is no actual city. “The Road to El Dorado” is a metaphor for our path through life to achieve enlightenment.
1. Ok. In fact, I can’t say anything because I don’t even know where we are.
2. The road. An asphalt highway or a higher extension...
1. Don’t finish that sentence! An asphalt highway.
2. Thank you for clearing that up.
1. No problem. So?
2. So... what?
1. So... “For what purpose” did the “Gallus Gallus Domesticus” “Traverse” the “Asphalt Highway”?
2. Hmmm... I do not know.
1. To get to the other side!!!
2. The other side?
1. Yes!
2. The ethereal plain or the juxtapose of where they set forth?
1. What? Oh... what now?
2. Well, are they looking to move on to a life beyond our mortal existence?
1. WHAT?
2. Are they looking to end their life? Die. And then move on to the ethereal plain. Or Heaven. You know get to “The Other Side”.
1. Erm... I don’t know.
2. Or the exact opposite of where their journey began from one edge of the asphalt highway to the other edge?
1. Erm... I think the second one. But now I don’t know.
2. Well, I think you should find out before you starting asking me questions.
1. I wasn’t asking you a question! Look it’s a classic joke - “Why did the chicken cross the road?”
2. You mean: For what purpose did the Gallus Gallus Domesticus traverse the asphalt highway?
1. Exactly!
2. Why?
1. “To get to the other side!”
2. You mean: To reach the etherial plain.
1. No.
2. Or: To reach the juxtapose position from which they began.
1. NO! NO! NO!
2. Well... if you’re going to tell a joke at least tell it properly.
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